I’ve been married for 2 years, 8 months, and 11 days. I love my husband, and I’ve recently been thinking about how I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that he is the right man for me. Because, you see, I came dangerously close to ending up with the wrong man. The guy I was with wasn’t a bad person, but he wasn’t my person.
People say that, when you find your forever person, you’ll just know. I say, that’s not always the case. There are things that we all want in our ideal person. Blonde hair, blue eyes. Tall, dark, and handsome. Whatever. Those are nice, but they’re not the ultimate. The traits of the person you should be with are what really matters, and sometimes you have to step back and look at the bigger picture to see if they really are The One.
- Be with someone who supports you. Now, I don’t necessarily mean financially. There’s nothing wrong with being joint earners of the household income or even you bringing home the bacon yourself. No, the support I mean is your hopes and dreams. Be with someone who encourages you to fulfill your vision. Someone who helps you move towards your goals. Be with someone who lifts you up, not brings you down. And, be with someone who, when you are down, is able to lift you back up again.
- Be with someone who makes you laugh. This might not sound like a big deal, but, trust me, it is. You want someone who gets your humor. You want someone that you can be goofy with and not feel like an idiot. Or at least someone who will be an idiot with you! You’re planning to spend the rest of your life with this person. Shouldn’t they be able to elicit a giggle from you? And nothing works better than a good laugh to bring you out of a funk when you’re having a bad day.
- Be with someone who you want to spend time with. Like I said, you’re planning to spend the rest of your life with this person. They’re the last face you’ll see each night and the first one you’ll see each morning. They’re the one that you’ll be stuck in the car with for hours on those long road trips. They’re the one that will take care of you when you’re sick, and vice versa. This is the person whose laundry you’ll clean and whose dishes you’ll wash. You want this to be the person who gets you excited to go to the grocery store because you’ll be going together.
- Be with someone who loves the real you. This is the biggest one. Because the real you has those hopes and dreams and that weird sense of humor. The real you comes out all the time. I understand keeping the weird hidden for the first few dates, but you can’t hide it forever. And why would you want to? You don’t have to spend the rest of your life walking on eggshells wondering if you’re going to annoy that person with whom you share your life, home, and food. Be with someone who wants to kiss you, even with the bad morning breath. Be with someone who wants to just lay in bed and talk about everything and nothing. Be with someone who can speak volumes to you with just a look. Be with someone who has seen The Real You and thinks you’re gorgeous.
Because, sweetie, you are beautiful. ❤